Hard To Hold

We always joke that we are Noah's ark. Animals just seem to gravitate toward us, they seem to feel at ease enough regardless of two very loud little girls and a 94 lb. Lab and 52 lb. Retriever. Even in suburbia. We've had encounters with a whole entire family of snakes (we used to catch all of them sunning themselves on our back patio). Another time, our dog, Calvin, found a bunny burrow intact with three baby bunnies in our backyard. Calvin again pointed out baby birds learning how to fly off our wood pile (those chickadees hopped away as fast as they could). We came across a giant lizard cooling himself in our wheel wells. One May we were surprised to find a hummingbird nest built low enough to peer in at three little eggs that we were able to watch hatch, and then learn to fly--what a treat! We rescued a baby bird that crash landed into our garage door and baked in the Texas sun on our driveway for more than a few hours. More recently we've acquired a new kitty, well she's the neighborhood kitty, but she sleeps on our porch. All of these we're great opportunities and experiences to share with our girls. And they all had happy endings. Or happy beginnings and middles. Unfortunately as life goes, that's not always the case.

Late afternoon yesterday, a little bird flew into our sliding glass door. At least I think that's what happened. I had just let our dog, Miley, out in the backyard and noticed she was pawing at something underneath the Little Tykes see saw, on the patio. I could see something moving. I was sure it was a snake, but it was a bird. It was kind of jammed up under the see saw and it looked like Miley was trying to get it to come out from under it. I lifted up the see saw to see little bird was in bad shape. Break my heart right then and there. I grabbed a dish towel and gently picked her up. Her little eyes were barely open and she was still breathing, but you could see she was struggling. I'm guessing she flew into the window, cuz a little earlier in the afternoon I had heard a thump on the window. I thought it was Miley jumping after a fly on the door or something. She is crazy about the flies and bees lately. And she was kind of looking around all over for it after that thump. Now I think, she had thought the bird flew into the house and was looking for the bird. I think the bird crash landed right under the see saw and when Miley went out, she kind of pawed it under the see saw more trying to get it out from under there. Poor little thing. So I held it in the dish towel and hollered at the girls to bring me some water, hoping she was just hot and stunned. After giving her a little drop of water, she stuck her little wing out. I thought she might come around. I wanted my girls to see her fly away. But no. After a little while, a few tortured minutes, little bird died in my hands as I stoked her. I felt like all the rest of the birds in the yard knew it too. They had been watching, crazily chattering. I remembered when we saved that baby bird in Texas, that it's momma and daddy birds were frantic over where their baby was. They were flying and darting all around the nest, and me. When I was able to put the bird back in the nest (even though it was the next day--it had stayed in our laundry room that night), the momma and daddy birds flew right to it. Thank goodness...within minutes it flew away.

We said a little prayer for little bird yesterday. At least she didn't die under the see saw. I swaddled her in the dish towel and put her in a little strawberry container. That was hard to hold. I know this is a "small" thing to write about, but when these things happen, I think it's important to pause.