Sunday, January 31, 2010

What's With All The Questions?

I love these suckers.  Thanks Jennifer, at Stuff Jen Says , for giving me a blog post today!

1.  Do you get manicures/pedicures? Mostly pedicures. 

2. When did you last get your hair cut? October--I'm so due AND it's time to break down and COLOR, because I HAVE TO. Frickin' beauty.

3. Do you get regular massages? Nope.  But I keep remembering and then promptly forgetting that my sister got me a gift certificate for a massage for my birthday IN MAY.  WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?!

4. Have you ever waxed a part of your body?  Funny you should ask though...(I'm just gonna leave that one hangin').

5. Can you see your veins? Yes and YET, every time, I have to give blood it takes 3 people to do it.  Flip.  And I won't talk about my legs, cuz you know--I'll get MAD, MAD, MAD.

6. Do you use tanning beds? I did back in the daaaay, but now I much prefer the spray tans. 

7. Favorite soap? Dove. (wow, you are really learning a lot here.)

8. Favorite shampoo? Bath & Body Works Eucalyptus Spearmint.  Wonderful stuff it is.

9. Favorite kind of music? All kinds.  I need's like oxygen.

10. Favorite time of day? Um...probably 6 a.m. (before everyone is awake--the coffee tastes better when everyone is still sleeping) and after the chickens go to bed...bra off (bliss) and pj's on. Fabulous. All that time in between is dang good too, but I SWEAR I don't exhale until my kiddos close them little eyes and I stretch out good on the couch.

11.Favorite local tourist attraction? There is so much to do here!  Pretty much anything outdoors, especially in the spring, summer and fall.  I love getting out in the trails and trees and we love the coast.  I love, love, love Sunriver.  It could very well be my favorite.

12. Favorite swear word? I NEVER swear.  I say things like Fruit Loop, Flip and Frick. Notice... a lot of F-words.  Wait, I say PICKLES too!  All mad like.

13. Favorite fruit? Strawberries and blueberries.  It's a tie.

14.Favorite kind of meat? Ooooh, I am a meat-eater.  If fact, I am craving RIBS like you would not beeeeelieve right now.  Just feed me. 

15. Favorite fish? Salmon and Orange Roughy.

16. Favorite flavor milkshake? Vanilla

17. Favorite kinds of candy? Reece's Peanut Butter Cups make me real happy as I eat them, and then I feel immediately guilty and fat, fat, fatty fat. They are dang good though and SERIOUSLY need to be a SUPER FOOD.  I also like Mike and Ikes, Junior Mints, Skittles.  And dark chocolate. Was I just supposed to pick one?

18. Have you ever eaten a whole bag of potato chips? No, but in real life I would want to.  I like the salty.

19. Have you ever eaten lobster? Yes, it's yummy, but a lot of work.

20. What’s a food you’re embarrassed to admit you love? Spam.  Shhhhh...don't tell anybody. 

21. What’s the weirdest food you’ve ever eaten? My dad tricked us when we were little and we ate rattlesnake.  (Look at me...I'm freaking out right now as I type this...30 years later!).

22. Have you ever climbed a mountain? Not a big one.  But yes.  I've driven up big ones tho.

23. Have you ever been skydiving or bungee jumping? Nope.  There are plans in the works to go Zip-Lining tho.  Does that count?

24. Have you ever been water-skiing? Nope, just water tubing.

25. Do you like your nose? If you're looking at it from the front, it'll do, but the side view is a whole other story.  I've just recently learned that your nose doesn't stop growing.  WHAT THE?! I am very upset about this.

26. Would you change the color of your eyes if you could? That is the ONE thing I would not change.

27. Do you like salt and vinegar potato chips? Oh GOSH yes!

28. Do you eat salsa? Yep...I could live on chips and salsa alone.  Love homemade pico de gallo.

29. What do you buy at the movie theater concession stand? Junior Mints.

30. Do you own a boat? No, and I totally need to make a friend that has a boat.  Dang it all.

31. Do you have a pool? Just the kind you blow up, sit in with drink in hand and splash yourself once in a while.

32. Can you swim? Yes, it's my favorite.

33.Which do you prefer, bagel or toast?  Bagel, but toast also makes me happy.

34. Cats or dogs? Both, but I love dogs a smidge more.  Don't tell my cat.

35. Pens or pencils? Hmmmm...Sharp #2's--I like having the ability to erase.  I like pens too, but they MUST have the cap intact, or it's a no-go.

36. Coffee or tea? Coffee, but I've been trying to drink the tea more, cuz it's REALLY good for you.  And I like good for you.

37. Bath or shower? Shower, but only because I don't have the big, soaking tub like I used to back in the day, so I gotta use the "kids tub", which I feel like I need to clean BEFORE I take the bath and it's just a lot of flipping work (plus there's always naked Barbies all sprawled out everywhere and it just kind of ruins it for me). But I would REALLY like a hot tub in the future.  Please, please and PLEASE.

38. Markers or crayons? Crayons.  I had no idea I preferred one over the other, but I totally do. 

39. You’re making a trip across the country. Fly, unless I'm in a big ol' RV trailer.  This is on my wish list.

40. First credit card you had? I believe it was Target. 

41. First loan you got was for? College.

42. First major purchase? Car.

43. What was your first job? I babysat like a champ back in the day.  But my first REAL job, was Burger King. 

44. What was your occupation previous to the one you have now? I was an Independent Consultant (fancy, right?) for Southern Living atHome for 4 years and then same thang for AtHome America.  Before that, (when I was pregnant with Livy-girl) I worked in a heating/plumbing office doing errrrthang office-like.  I loved that job. Who knew I loved data entry and payroll AND working with plumbers?! 

45. Have you ever had stitches? heart surgery (I've got a biiiig scar) and cracking my head open (little scar).

46. Last time you went to the hospital for something? I recently had an MRI on my heart. 

47. Last place you drove to? Church, last night.

48. Last place you flew to? Arizona.

49. Last time you were at a sports bar? I *think* I was at one last night???

50. Last thing you celebrated? John's birthday, last night.  Didn't know him, but he was nice enough. :)

Okay now, you do this.  Tell me some stuff.

Friday, January 22, 2010

Do Not Do This At Home

A special note to The Hubbs, in defense of Going to the Spa.

Last week I went and did the big Target shopping.  The cart was loaded with things that we needed (detergent, kitty litter, paper towels, sponges, light bulbs, dishwasher soap, and on and on and on...) and nothing that makes me go, ooooooooh...pretty.  I will say I was a tad bit...we'll say hopeful, instead of excited about one little purchase--

See it? Take a good look. That little $5.99 purchase was loaded with GUILT for me all week. It was supposed to make me beautiful (specifically in the chin region of my face), but, instead added two new blemishes, three new "worry wrinkles", and five new gray hairs. Lemme tell you why. Though that little sucker came home with me, I didn't actually purchase it.

I know, I are all shocked. Me too, me too. Lemme explain.

So, I get out to the car to load all my newly purchased needed, but boring, Target items into the car and notice that the Neutrogena tube had fallen out of one of the bags and was in the cart--or so I talked myself into. I needed to get home and I was sure I paid for it. So I left. The guilt started to seep in with every mile I drove away from the store, and it gnawed at me good. As soon as I got home, I tore through the bags, looking for the receipt. Sure enough, I totally stole it.

Now some people would be screaming, BONUS, and things like, Sucks to be you, Target!, apply the face mask, in the garage, via the car's side mirrors, THEN unload the Target bags, doing a little happy dance. Yeah, I didn't do that. I knew that if I put one drop of that sucker on my face (specifically the chin region), as a payment from The Universe, it would have acid in it and I would be severely disfigured for life. Oh yeah--total worst case scenario.

So, I vowed to take that sucker back and pay for it immediately. But then the kids came home from school, the dog peed on the carpet, I had to take the clothes out of the washer and put them into the dryer and I forgot about it for a week.

Okay, I didn't forget about it entirely. I shoved it under the bathroom sink, in the far, dark corner, where I couldn't look at it. Then I promptly got five new gray hairs, three “worry wrinkles” and two new blemishes.

I knew I had to take it back. But Target is so faaaaar away. (Not really, you are in that area pretty much every day of your life, Sunshine.) I’ll just throw it away. (Still doesn’t negate the fact that you didn’t pay for it, Sunshine.) I’ll give it as a gift to someone. (Then THEY will have severe disfiguration—can you live with that, SUNSHINE?!)

But, but, but…what if the lady at Target’s Guest Service yells, SECURITY!!, and I get arrested? (I shop here all the time!! I have receipts, statements! I loooove Target!!!) My kids will get home from school and I won’t be there, they will cry and the dog will surely pee on the carpet again.

How about I sneak it back IN Target and put it back on the shelf? No, I’m sure they will see me on Them Security Cameras and yell SECURITY!!! and I’ll get arrested even before I get past the $1 bins.

How about I drive to Target and put it in a cart that’s in the parking lot, and then leave? No harm done. Brilliant. NO.

How about I go into Target, purchase ANOTHER tube and then leave it in a cart in the parking lot? DANG IT. NO. Stupid, stupid conscience.

Look, it’s not like I’ve never done anything wrong. I flipping do ALL THE TIME. Girl t’ain’t perfect. But I just don’t need one more check mark against me—it just might tip the bucket over, if you get my meaning.

So I took it back, ready to face the consequences. I told my story, braced myself for the handcuffs and planned my mugshot. To my surprise (disappointment), the lady at Target’s Guest Service was so amazed I brought it back. She went on and on (about how wonderful I was). I’m sure numerous Target employees were JUST ABOUT TO swarm all around me, walkie-talkie’s buzzing like crazy to bust it to Guest Services immediately, and a sea of red, polo shirts would lift me up and carry me up and down the aisles, cheering, clapping and making an example of me. THIS IS WHAT YOU DO, PEOPLE, THIS IS WHAT YOU DO!! DO NOT STEAL!!

But I paid for it and got the heck out of there, before, you know, they went overboard.

And this. Is Why. I need to go to the spa, instead. The End.

Friday, January 1, 2010


I'm stealing this from my beautiful, fierce, she's-kicking-Cancer's-arse-whilst-rocking-the-rexy wigs-and hats, girlfriend, Jennifer (you can find her here-- I'm stealing this cuz whatever she does IS COOL and I looooove the questions.  Details, people, details. 

What did you do in 2009 that you’d never done before?
Three vacations without The Hubbs and Squirrels.  Girlfriend Getaway.

Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
Didn't make any.

Did anyone close to you give birth?

Did anyone close to you die?
Ugh. Yes.

What countries did you visit?
Just mine.  A lot of mine.

What would you like to have in 2010 that you lacked in 2009?
Sunriver, please.

What dates from 2009 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
April 14. Bad, bad day.  We lost Elizabeth.

What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Sticking to Jazzercise.  Fo' real.  This is huge for me.  5 days a week.  I get cranky if I miss it. SO not like me.  I'm pretty dang proud of that. I haven't felt this good in a long arse time.

What was your biggest failure?
Losing my niece.

Did you suffer illness or injury?
No.  I usually trip a lot, so that's good. 

What was the best thing you bought?
My new phone...My Touch.  Love it to pieces!  And truthfully, smaller sized clothes (again, Jazzercise).

Whose behavior merited celebration?
Jennifer's.  Yep.

Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
Prolly mine. That whole werewolf thang.

Where did most of your money go?
Clothes.  I'm not usually into clothes that much, but I thank Jazzercise for this again.  And, and, and I cannot fail to mention my favorite store in the world--Simple Folk.  It gets a lot of bidness from me.

What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Going to Vegas with my sister and mom and meeting up with life long girlfriends in Tucson. 

What song will always remind you of 2009?
Come and Get Higher by Matt Nathanson

Compared to this time last year, are you: (a) happier or sadder? (b) thinner or fatter? (c) richer or poorer?

a. Happier. Always happier.

b. Thinner (Jazzercise).

c. By MY definition of rich, I'm richer.  Always richer.  Like the happy. :) 

What do you wish you’d done more of?

What do you wish you’d done less of?
I would say Facebooking, but that would be a lie.

How did you spend Christmas?
With all the family.  LOADS of togetherness.  I type this with a smile.

Did you fall in love in 2009?
I am always falling in love.  I love you right now.

What was your favorite TV program?
30 Rock.  No question.

Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
I still hate Cancer. 

What was the best book you read?
The Twilight series.

What was your greatest musical discovery?
I like a lot of stuff.

What did you want and get?
A girlfriend getaway.

What did you want and not get?
Well, prolly for The Hubbs to be home more.  I don't see that happening. 

What was your favorite film of this year?
New Moon.

What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I went out with The Hubbs.  I just asked him what we did and neither of us can remember.  I remember wanting to go out for mexican food (Cinco de Mayo), but not doing that.  I think I had a good time though. :)  I turned 36.

What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Prolly if The Hubbs were home more.  But maybe that's WHY it was a pretty good year.  HA.  I kid, I kid...

How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2009?

What kept you sane?
My daily glass of wine.  Friends.

Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Tina Fey.

What political issue stirred you the most?
I don't know if "stirred" is the right word.  Or "political". 

Who did you miss?

Who was the best new person you met?
Jennifer.  Hands down.

Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2009.
Pay attention. And love 'em good.

Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
I think I'll let this remain a mystery.  Shocked, aren't you?

Happy 2010!