Saturday, December 5, 2009

Let's Be Real

It's been a pretty low-key week.  Still busy as ever with the kids, dance classes, PTO stuff, Christmas shopping, Christmas decorating in and out and all around (I need a wreath for the car--errrbody's doing it), winterizing the house and the normal hum of our routine, just not too much *extra*, if you know what I mean.  This week I subtracted a coffee date (I missed my French toast latte with B and The Boy big this week) and added a Civil War game (Go Ducks!  Go Beavers!--I love everyone, which makes me a platypus), Bunco and a nap at Barnes & Noble (thanks Jen), so you know, it all works out.  Can you believe that's "low key"?  'Tis.

Okay, I totally have to write about this, cuz I saw it, and I can't stop thinking about it.  That's when I know it goes to the blog.  I was switching around on the telly (my pretend British accent, cuz I'm about to tell you a British tale), and came upon the BBC channel, and a documentary called, My Fake Baby.  I stopped, immediately pulled in (pushing the Tivo button as I knew I'd want to show this to someone).  It is here I was introduced into a world I had no idea was out there.  I am so sheltered.  And normal. 

Apparently there is a very good sized market out there for these dolls called, Reborns.  They are dolls made to look incredibly real.  They are exquisit, beautiful, dolls that will absolutely make you siiiigh, and stir your maternal instincts.  They are that good.  Doll collectors adore them.  They can be custom made with birthmarks, little newborn scratches to their face, forcep marks, dimples, crooked pinkies, real hair, heartbeats, breathing mechanisms, can be weighted and pretty much anything else you can think of that would make a doll look real enough to pick up, cradle and sing to.  They are amazing.  Amazing, I tell you.  I called my girls down to watch it with me and we all went a little goo-goo. Little bit.

And then...and then, here came the world I had no idea existed.  Apparently there are people that will go out in real life with these dolls and pretend play that they are real babies.  They will buy car seats, strollers, bottles (filled with liquid fabric softener, so that it doesn't go moldy) and go in real life situations (playgrounds, restaurants, shopping, etc...) as if these dolls are their children. 

One couple (yes, I said couple, like not only is there a woman who is doing this, but a married woman with a partner that will do this with her), were at an aquarium with the doll and had someone take a picture of them with the doll in front of the shark tank.  What?  I'll type it again, WHAT?! 

This poor woman even went as far as to fly from Britain to Washington D.C. to "adopt" a "baby girl".  She even went shopping for a take home outfit and paid just under $300 for one little designer outfit.  (faint) While in D.C., she spent a couple days "bonding" with her baby, only to realize that her baby had a crack on its head, which made the doll (cuz as soon as she saw the baby had the crack, it pretty much became a regular old doll again) useless and the woman returned home empty handed, and completely distraught. 

What is GOING ON?!  Okay, look, to each their own. This poor woman isn't hurting anyone. I know there are probably many reasons why people would do this.  I don't even want to think about what I would do if I lost a baby.  I won't even go there.  And really, these dolls are amazing!  The six-year-old little girl in me WANTS ONE (or eight).  But two seconds into that thought, reality settles in, as it should, and all these bells and whistles start blaring that I'm bordering crazyDo not go there.  And like a normal person, I don't go there. 

I can just imagine if I popped one of those dolls in a sling and went to my girls' school to do my PTO duties,  "kid in tow".  For a second all the peeps in the teachers' workroom would melt, cuz they'd really think I had a baby in there (I didn't even know you were pregnant).  Then they'd realize and it would become very uncomfortable and awkward and they would be patting my back and saying, "Awwww, poor thing," and then, in a big group, they'd all go see the school counselor to discuss an Intervention For Sunshine.  Or I'd get fired.  But I'm a volunteeeeer... I'd still get fired and The Crazy would go on my record and I'd have to move. By myself, cuz my hubby don't like crazy.

I don't want to move.  I like it here.  So I'm totally not getting a doll.  And don't you do it either.  Now go look at these pics and do not get sucked in and go crazy.  Just look, be amazed, tell your friends, siiigh at great length and then go back to reality and stay there. 

Snippet of the BBC documentary--My Fake Baby

Okay, I'm done now.


Jen said...

OK, as I said yesterday when you told me about this, I want the brown baby and the daddy who goes with it. But otherwise, I totally agree with the reaction you'd get in the workroom at school. It would definitely be Intervention Time for Sunshine. Yikes-a-hootie, we would fa-reak atchoo.

Sunshine said...

Jen--You better! The second you see me looking cRaZy, you get help--QUICK! Back up!

I would do the same for you. :)

Dee from Downunder said...

wow - they are amazing dolls - a little too lifelike though... eek